I walk fast. Everywhere I go, I walk fast. Guess what? My horses walk fast too. Did I create that or am I drawn to it? Do my horses like to walk fast, or are they reluctantly keeping up with me all of the time?
Recently, I was leading one of my student’s horses from his pasture up to the tack room. I realized that I was walking way faster than this horse wanted to walk. This guy is a low-energy stopper. There are times where I’ll expect responsiveness and ask the horse to hustle up beside me, but at this moment I decided that I wanted to build rapport and connection with this horse by walking slower and bringing my energy down to his level. It was such a cool feeling to be in harmony with him, instead of arguing over the speed of the walk. I know that when I do ask him to put in a little more hustle he’ll be more likely to do it without arguing since I’ve invested in building a connection with him.
It’s important to build a connection with our horses. Connection should be the foundation of your relationship and training. Without it, you have nothing. Without it, your horse is an unwilling participant. When I walk into the pasture I want my horses to think, “Oh boy! She’s here!”, not, “Oh no! She’s here.”
Become the human your horse wants you to be. Match their energy. If you have a high-energy horse that likes to move its feet, be a high-energy person who also likes to move its feet. If this isn’t natural to you, you’ll have to put in a conscious effort when you’re in their presence, like I did to walk slowly with my student’s horse. If your horse is a low-energy horse that likes to stop or go slow, be a low-energy person that likes to stop and go slow. Meet your horse where they are, become a person they enjoy being around, and they’ll put in more effort for you later.
I’m committed to being more aware of how I can better match the energy of whatever horse I’m interacting with or handling, from the moment I enter their pasture. The way I open the gate, the way I walk across the field, the way I greet the horse, the way I pet them or maybe don’t touch them at all, the way I put the halter on, the way I lead them, the way I groom them – all of these things mean something. The way I do something to or with them is either building rapport and connection or deteriorating it. Everything means something.
Have you ever thought about what kind of human your horse wants you to be?